Monday, March 30, 2009

What is it the time for now?

"Happiness is not a brilliant climax to years of grim struggle and anxiety. It is a long succession of little decisions simply to be happy in the moment.” - J. Donald Walters
A colleague with divinity background once told me that this is one of his favorite questions for reflection: What is it the time for now?

As I think back on how I spent so much of my time over the last two years and how different that is from how I am currently spending it, the question keeps coming up. It's certainly coming up with regard to my physical activities - as I get lapped in the pool and watch others do intervals in circles around me and notice the bike in my shed that hasn't been ridden since November 1 and cheer for my friends as triathlon season begins.

More importantly, it's coming up as I think about this time in my life, my pregnancy, and the choices that brought to me to where I am today. I realized last week that I could not have done this even one year earlier. I wasn't ready physically, mentally, spiritually, or emotionally. For me, THIS is the time - the perfect time - to journey into parenthood. And while that means it's not the time for those other things, I know that it will be again someday. Instead now is the time to notice the process and not focus on the goal; now is the time to remember breath and form; now is the time to celebrate the pleasures of being outside and not worry about the clock.

Simply being -- instead of always doing.

2 comments:

Carolina John said...

you know when it's the right time to have kids. and this is one area where, as a husband, you can't trust your husbands judgement as much as your own.

so carpe diem, sieze the time you have now. i can also HIGHLY reccomend a weekend getaway with just you and the husband. we took off about a month before our first was born, and didn't get another weekend alone until about a month before the second one was born almost 2 years later. now with the youngest one turning 2 in may, we've had maybe 2 or 3 weekends just me and her since then.

it will really make you two feel connected, and having the baby is such an emotionally uprooting thing, you will really cherish that time alone. i know i do.

Joy | Love | Chaos said...

Robyn -- I can't believe I missed this new development! Congratulations! I'm so happy for you. I can't wait to follow along here for all of the wonderful stories along the way. :)